Day 7: The 6 weeks school holiday start in earnest. I'm not sure how this is going to work, working from home when you're children are in a house full-time.
One advantage is that they are keen to stay in bed until at least 12 o'clock (I have known them to get up at 3pm if left undisturbed!) So, that is easily a good six hours in the morning to work without being interrupted, if I get up at 6 am. The older boy, like most 16 year olds, does his own thing, which rarely includes me. (Even though he has gone past the age were talking to me was a real pain and any interest that I dared to show in his life was an "intrusion on his privacy”) However, the 11 year old, now that one is a bothersome child!
A typical morning begins with him coming to ask me a series of questions before he goes to school. Now I am sure that they are important his world - not so in mine.
Son: what is the strongest acid? What happens when you mix acid with fire?, why doesn't the acid burn through a glass container? How do you make acid? Can I have my pocket money for the next 6 months so that I can order this chemistry set from Amazon? Etc...
Me (silently in my head): What is the matter with that boy, talk about bothersome! Why are you bothering me? Don’t bother me! What do you not understand about not bothering me when I am working? Talking is bothering me! I can't concentrate when you are speaking to me and I need to do this in a hurry! Can’t you tell me later ...?
Me (out loud): I don't know. Sulphuric? It’s a long time since I did chemistry, I can’t remember? Why don't you look it up on Google? You don't know how lucky you are to have so much information at the tip of your fingers. I don't think it's possible to mix acid and fire, why do you want to know anyway? What are you planning? Isn’t it time for school yet? Can’t you see I’m working?
Now I don't mean to sound so impatient and I always start with the best intentions of listening attentively and giving him my full attention but after the 20th pointless question (I do go to 20, trust me) I start to get irritated.
And now it looks like I've got six weeks of this to look forward to... Can't see me surviving!.
I know it's really important that we spend quality time with our children, unfortunately for many of us, often the demands of life get in the way. On the plus side it is nice that he still feels able to come and ask me questions and is prepared to speak with me. Indeed I should be flattered that he actually thinks that I know the answers to such complex chemistry questions.
Clearly I'm still his hero. What a shame that in a few short months I'll become a persona non grata as he heads towards the teenage years and emotional separation from anyone over the age of 15.
The start of the six-week holiday marks another milestone for me. I've done my primary school years. No more children to go through primary school. I'm now at that age where all my children need a mentor and coach rather than a nurturer and carer. I'm finally free of the child care years. Yippee.
It's not that I mind taking care of my children, but I've always been a working mum. I remember the anguish of having to sort out childcare to fit in with my employer’s requirement for me to attend my place of work. It never ceased to amaze me, how eager my children’s early year’s education providers were, to get them off the premises and into my hands during the working day. When I was in school, the only way out was in an ambulance and only if you had broken bones or were unconscious. Not so now. The slightest cough or additional trip to the toilet would result in a phone call to me with a request that I leave work and come and collect them. I shan't be missing that at all.
My mother is a great believer in the start secondary school marking the age of self-sufficiency. Once you started secondary school you became responsible for your own laundry, which meant if you failed to wash your uniform before Monday morning you were going to school in dirty clothes. You also got to be responsible for your nutritional needs - a.k.a. sorting your own food out if for some reason mum was unable to cook dinner. Needless to say this tradition has continued in my household and my youngest son is about to join the ranks of the self-sufficient! That should keep him occupied!
What parenting practices do you recall from your childhood and if you have children have you continued with them?
Image Back To School by digitalart
:) Yes I am from that era where you had to be dying to get sent home and this was when schools weren't locked down, no security as such, anyone including the children could walk in and out.
ReplyDeleteWith regards to parenting practices, no lie in for us, unfortunately! Up and dressed by 10am even during the hols, which is still a habit with me.
Imagine having 8 children to delight you all summer long, as my mother did.
ReplyDeleteI think there were advantages in having a big family, less parental scrutiny, someone to share/ squabble with....For some unfathomable reason I never greatly wanted to have children but if I did I'd follow my mother's example in many ways and remember the wisdom of Donald Winnicott, the advocate of Good Enough Parenting. Sounds to me you're on the right track.