Musical instruments – the parents endurance test

As every parent will tell you, parenting is a joy, and experience not to be missed. You learn so much from your children. They are like little Zen masters just waiting to expose you to the next lesson in tolerance, acceptance and transcendental meditation; I.e. how to completely disconnect from your immediate environment and go to a quiet noise free place of tranquillity: calm, calm.

However, there is one part of child-rearing which stands out as a test of endurance more than anything else that you will be required to do as a parent. It requires more tolerance than putting up with a terrible two-year-old, who is laying prone in the middle of the supermarket aisle, kicking and screaming because you refused their request for yet another pointless piece of plastic that the marketers deliberately put at ankle snapper height, just by the checkout.

More endurance than hosting the seven year old birthday party, including ice cream on your BOSE sound system (I don't have one but it illustrates the point); cake mashed into the carpet and sticky handprints on your walls. Double the endurance required to survive stroppy teenagers whose only form of communication are the words “Huuump”, “Urhhh” and “gosh that's not fair”.

What could be so bad... Yes you've got it – the little dears learning to play a new instrument! As parents we love to encourage talent. After all, who knows they could turn out to be very good at it, world-class even and that would be the pension sorted! Besides our job is to provide society with well adjusted, confident individuals and telling them that they have no talent and they should desist immediately really isn't conducive to developing self-esteem.

So whilst they practice the latest addition to their instrument collection you have to put up with the wailing that causes these every fibre in your being too recoil and sounds more like a hellcat on heat catcalling than any form of music you've ever heard. Thankfully my children are actually very talented when it comes to music so the learning/ screeching stage doesn't normally last that long. Although I do have my doubts whether their latest fad in instruments will sound nice even if it's played well. Let's hope they move onto the next thing quickly.

What instrument do you dislike the sound of the most. Please share, I look forward to reading your comments.